Issue 21

The Olb City Announcer

Volume 3, Issue 1
December 27th-January 2nd, 2020 and 2021, respectively

Huge, virtual New Year's party happens

by Tony Yuan

The Olb City government staged a huge New Year's celebration in Olb Plaza, with fireworks and acrobats. The show was livestreamed on Youtube but almost nobody was there in person. After the show, a couple thousand people gradually filtered into the plaza and enjoyed the beautiful veiws of the plaza covered in snow, after the snowstorm on Thursday. Before the event, the artwork Trojan Horse (See Issue 20) was removed from the plaza and installed in the middle of Shoreside Park, because of a risk of fire. “I'm really glad about the sense of community that this event has created” says Gardon Foresen, the administrator of the event.

Arts

by Lorenzo Avila and Tony Yuan

On Wednesday, an anonymous person resold an art peice titled The Flood for over 15 million Arenzos. It was painted by retired artist Leo Lahum, who is the brother of Deigo Lahum (See Issue 19). The 5 foot by 10 foot painting depicts a waterfall in a fictional wonderland. Leo Lahum told us that he had never planned on selling it, but then a man offered 12.5 million Arenzos for it. Leo immediately agreed and bought a motor home and a houseboat with the money so that he and his wife could spend their retirement traveling. The man who originally bought it is likely the same person who sold it on Wednesday; if that is the case, then that anonymous man would have turned an astounding profit of over 2.5 million Arenzos, more money than some small buisenesses make in a year.

Sports

by Sam-Louis Alrocaet

The Olb City Tigers, a new hockey team formed in Olb City, went up against the Hasianian Horses in the final game of the Tigers’ first season. They won in a landslide, 5-2. Their goalie, Samuel Williams, said that he is proud of himself and his team mates. “I am grateful for all the work our coach put in to help us reach this milestone,” he said. They will be awarded the trophy for Youngest Champion Team by the New Athens Association of Hockey.

Weather

by Mezoir Logan

Tropical Storm Vonso strengthened into a hurricane on Tuesday and swept past Noi City, causing some flooding and two injuries. Major damage was reported, with houses being severely damaged by hail and trees being blown right out of the ground. Reports say that Olb City will pass through one of the arms of the hurricane on Monday next week, and people are currently being evacuated from the projected flood zones of the Maracea, Anda, and Tortoise rivers. Meteorologists say that the Capitol, the Dripping Cone Offices, Olb University, and several other critical places are at risk of flooding. Workers are currently erecting a water barrier around these sites.

Coronavirus Report

by Owen Miyazoi

Cases dropped drastically to 524, and deaths are at an all-time low of 28. Doctors say that the pandemic in Arenztopia will largely be over by Febuary, thanks to the new Avac vaccine.

Feature: Gardon Foresen

By Lorenzo Avila

We interviewed Gardon Foresen, the billionare politician and entrepreneur who staged Friday's New Years celebration.

Olb City Announcer: Just briefly, what are the statistics of this event?

Gardon Foresen: Well, 450,000 people attended online this year and 30 A-List singers performed. With each ticket costing 5 Arenzos, we made roughly 2,250,000 Arenzos which will all be donated to COVID-19 research.

OCA: Wow! That's awesome! Who performed at the celebration?

GF: We had many people perform. We had Jenny Hlmt, a country singer based in New Paris; The Klk, a pop artist from Olb City; and a special live painting by Leo Lahum.

OCA: Cool! What made this event special compared to any other?

GF: I'm really glad about the sense of community that this event has created, I feel that really makes it special.

OCA: Well, that's all the questions that we have for you today, and thanks for coming!

GF: Thanks for inviting me!

This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

Restauraunt shut down

by Lorenzo Avila and Tony Yuan

A local restauraunt owner, Joe Lounou, was arrested on Tuesday for not following COVID-19 guidelines. He had his tables only 2 feet apart, not the required 6 feet. His restauraunt was operating at 100% capacity, not the required 25% capacity. And, perhaps most importantly, he was not enforcing masks or any sanitary guidelines of any kind. He told the Olb City Announcer that he “doesn't regret a thing.” The police have sentenced him to 50 years in jail in accordance to a law passed that classifies not following COVID-19 guidelines as attempted manslaughter. Our fact-checkers also did a thorough search of his police records (with permission of the OCPD) and found that he has a criminal record; after being arrested for shoplifting in 2015, he changed his name and opened this restauraunt. We have notified the OCPD about this potential criminal potential but have not heard back from them yet.

Poetry

by Lorenzo Avila

New years

New goals
New ideas
New everything
Happy new years!

Obituary

by Owen Miyazoi

Today we mourn the loss of Susan Rznwvw. She was a local baker who made 200 cookies a week at age 100 for the local childrens hospital to cheer the children up. She died of natural causes. Text 085-519-0632 to show sympathy.