Issue 6

The Olb City Announcer

Volume 1, Issue 6 April 5th-April 11th, 2020

Crazy!

by Tony Yuan

Merdwif Mental Hospital-A man was analyzed by police and psycologists and deemed to have lost all reason as a result of intensive total self-isolation. The man, who is known by the name Steve Jobink, was reported to a mental hospital, the police, and a psychologist after he started to “yell and pull his hair out”, according to his wife. Police are investigating if there are other cases, and if so how to prevent them. Mr. Jobink was put in a straitjacket and transported to Merdwif Mental Hospital on Friday where he is under constant observation by a specially appointed team of psycologists and therapists, and the hospital's administrators say he will be ready and normal in “less than a year”.

Arts

by Tony Yuan

For centuries, the valuable veins of salt in the high plains of the Tfziwrzmh have been mined for “white gold”. Now, historians and archaeologists have found an abandoned salt mine in the region of AĆ¼lberhassen. It was determined to be a very rare art repository from the age of the Arenztopian Revolution. However, after meticulous exploration of the mine, it was concluded that no works of art remained. Plans are being made to turn the site into a National Monument.

Sports

by Owen Miyazoi

The Hasianian Hornets beat the Chanlanian Chamaleons 5-4 an audience of 100,000 tuned in on television.

Weather

by Mezoir Logan

Next week's average temperature should be a typical 17 degrees celsius, with light showers coming in from the Northeast.

Comet

by Sam-Louis Alrocaet

On Monday, the asteroid 1282 Moore will fly past the sun, creating a magnificent tail thousands of miles long. It will be live broadcasted starting at 2pm from the Mckenzie Observatory in Arenztopia.

Breaking News

by Tony Yuan

It has been confimed that the black panther at Olb City Zoo has come down with the Coronavirus. A team of designers and engineers are hurriedly designing a ventilator to fit the panther. The black panther, one of the last of its kind in Arenztopia, started to exhibit a severe cough and then tested positive of Covid-19.

Fyreworld 2-Virus!

By Sam-Louis Alrocaet

On the mobile app of the bestselling game Fyreworld 2, many users have been reporting a virus that causes pop-up ads to blanket the entire screen, and even if you close your phone then it is still there. It has only been reported on Fyreworld 2, however, Fyreworld's developers are trying to kill the virus.

Nutrifarms wastes food “For the good of our employees”

by Owen Miyazoi

On Tuesday, a Nutrifarms spokesperson confirmed the rumors that Nutrifarms was dumping millions of pounds of food. “Because of the pandemic, we cannot ship the food to food banks,” said the spokesperson.

Coronavirus Report

by Owen Miyazoi

A huge spike was detected as cases nearly doubled to 410 cases. There are now 38 deaths, as confirmed by the government.

Poetry

by Tony Yuan

Quarantine
Bored and excited
two opposites
yet then they
come together
and make a
Quarantine.

Bars Closed

by Sam-Louis Alrocaet

After repeated calls from authorities, all bars in Arenztopia were strictly locked down on Friday by King Avila. Similar measures are expected to be taken on car dealerships soon, as the coronavirus spreads throughout the globe.

Obituary

by Owen Miyazoi

Arilan Omunake, the wife of famed city judge Derrkan Omunake, passed away peacefully at her home on Friday. She was 87 years old. Mrs. Omunake was also a vocal women's rights advocate in the 1960s. To show support for Mr. Omunake and the rest of Mrs. Omunake's surviving family, call 680-782-6642.

Satellite Launched

by Owen Miyazoi

On Tuesday, the new satellite GIDO-10 was launched. It will be part of the GIDO series of satellites, which will analyze desertification and deforestation across the world using unprecedented cameras and data-analysis technology.

Editorial

by Sam-Louis Alrocaet

The government appears to be handling the coronavirus pandemic well, but to truly overcome this crisis, Arenztopia needs to have a better plan for the future.

Oil Economy Boosted

by Tony Yuan

On Wednesday, King Avila approved a bill calling for heightened oil importing, more oil drilling, and a total of 200 million Arenzos given to oil companies as the country attempts to restart its struggling oil economy. The efforts are already having an impact: the OTM jumped over 700 points on Friday, and economists predict even more growth in the coming weeks.